The Whole-Brain Child: Developing Cognitive Skills and Decision-Making
Welcome to the second installment of our six-part series on "The
Whole-Brain Child" strategies. In this post, we'll explore two key
strategies that focus on developing your child's cognitive skills and
decision-making abilities: "Engage, Don't Enrage" and "Use It or
Lose It".
Strategy 3: Engage, Don't Enrage
The "Engage, Don't Enrage" strategy is about encouraging your
child to think and listen rather than react impulsively. Here's how to
implement this approach:
- Stay Calm: When your
child is upset or misbehaving, remain calm yourself. Your composure can
help de-escalate the situation.
- Ask Questions: Instead of
immediately scolding or punishing, ask questions to engage your child's
thinking brain. For example, "What do you think might happen if you
continue with this behavior?"
- Encourage
Problem-Solving: Guide your child to come up with solutions. You might ask,
"What could you do differently next time?"
- Validate
Feelings: While addressing the behavior, acknowledge your child's emotions.
"I understand you're angry, but hitting is not okay. Let's think of
better ways to express your anger."
By engaging your child's rational thinking rather than escalating
emotions, you're helping them develop crucial problem-solving skills and
emotional regulation.
Strategy 4: Use It or Lose It
The "Use It or Lose It" strategy focuses on exercising the
"upstairs brain" - the part responsible for sound decision-making,
self-understanding, and empathy. Here's how to put this strategy into action:
- Offer Choices: Regularly
present your child with age-appropriate choices. For example, "Would
you like to wear the red shirt or the blue one today?"
- Encourage
Planning: Involve your child in planning activities or solving problems. You
might ask, "We're going to the park later. What do you think we
should bring?"
- Practice
Perspective-Taking: Encourage your child to
consider others' viewpoints. You could ask, "How do you think your
friend felt when that happened?"
- Discuss
Consequences: Help your child think through the potential outcomes of their
actions. "If you stay up late tonight, how do you think you'll feel
tomorrow morning?"
- Reflect on
Experiences: After events or activities, discuss them with your child. Ask what
they enjoyed, what they found challenging, and what they learned.
By consistently exercising these "upstairs brain" functions,
you're helping your child strengthen their cognitive abilities and
decision-making skills.
Implementing these strategies requires patience and consistency.
Remember, the goal is not perfection but progress. Every time you engage your
child's thinking brain or offer them a chance to make a decision, you're
contributing to their cognitive development.
In our next post, we'll explore strategies related to the power of
movement and memory in child development. Stay tuned!
